Wednesday, June 20, 2007

Broken......Fragmented.......

Of late why....I myself don't know Ive started to hate this world around me..I feel al broken up & can sense n see for myself being fragmented & shattered into several pieces..Why is this happening??? I seriouslyyy don't have any idea..Is there just no one who can hear my scream & see my condition.........











No sympathy needed but I need someone to listen to me when I wanna speak,allow me my space,allow me to do things at 'my will' n not force me do so,love me unconditionally when all hve left me n gone n none to turn to when they r needed,to pacify,cool me down.Goddamnit how I hate my life now........it has been never so lonely,moorse as now n don't I have anyone to say.............IM THERE THEN WHY FEAR....is no arms I can go rushing into n just cry n scream my pains out......How to torture my family & friends..don't they have their own life n priorities,I wanna see them happy and Im not blamin them for this happening of mine,bt this whole frustration & depression has it made me all the more selfish n demanding...?????maybe no.....or maybe yes.......!!!!!!!
I want to arise above the confusion I want to lead my life........Please help me someone....
And once again saying it is not pinpointing to al those close to me nor my family neither my frnds....It juz a outburst of my inner self!!!!!!!! I know u guys will alwyz b thr 2 back me up still dunno know wtz dis happening....:O??????????

Once again a biggggg Sorry for such a depressing post guys......didnt mean to hurt u pple....

22 comments:

neers said...

Hey hey...yeh sorry sorry kya hai?? how can u of all ppl can depress us sweetie?
Btw,i cant say i've experienced exactly how u feel (or more precisely,abt whom u feel) but i definitely know the feeling of being lonely...but that doesnt mean we hate start hating the world,start hating our life..and u know what, sometimes u shud be a lil selfish.apne baare mein socha kar kabhi..ppl who love u will always stand by u,no matter what..but otherwise, its equally imp to think abt urself.
u being depressed, or being hurt is not goin to change things..yes it will hurt a lot but we're all here to take care of u.so whenever u wanna talk,u wanna shout,scream,cry..whatever it is..we're all only a call away.
Things will get better..just hang in there :)
love u loads..muah!

The 'Mad' Orchid said...

Yeps angel..know tht vry wel :P n
yaad nahi yeh sabko hit kia hai...n
yepsie ur vry ture re.i know things ought 2 get n wil get bettr as soon as possible...:) wid al of ur support n ofcoz most of luv..:D bt juz wantd 2 blurt out my inner frustu aur kuch b nai..m fyn othrwise nt hatng ne1...:P
Luv u too lods n haan kya baat hai ajkal tu hi first one 2 commnt..keep it up ;)muahssss..

neers said...

Good :)
and i have no probs with u venting out ur frustrations here..infact this is the only way i get to know whats "really" happening :p and letting out all that always helps..so no issue there. U r the primary concern...tu theek hai to bas sab theek hai

neers said...

and i get to be the first one...hehe accha hai na. lemme take full advantage of the situation :D

IncorrigibleV said...

hey cheri.... pehle toh >:D< a big hug... and as far as the screamin goes...hum yahan kisliye hain bacche...u can scream ur head off in my ears and i wont even flinch. I do it all the time and i know how much it helps...
And ure not being selfish at all...this is very much needed...but then we have the power na sweetie...let it all out on blogger...feels lighter nahi?
loads of luv
vands
always here....

The 'Mad' Orchid said...

@ Dams ..a biggg >:D< 2 u 2..sweets
Yeps darls sure re blogger does help a lotttttt :P, n seriously haan re....:)n didnt i scream using blogger as a medium :P n as u read evntually u get 2 hear my screams..rite...:D so....Btw,n as i told u in aj ki convo & itz al tken care of al thxs 2 u al ..n yesh i know u r there now n alwyz..:D
Lodsa luv 2..:-*..

Occasional Brilliance said...

hey mads... yeh kya srry laga rakkha hai? did i nt mention on one of my comments ki dosti mein sunna bhi hota hai... sirf bolne se kuch nahi hoga...

babes, u gotta knw re we're always there... yahi baat tu mujhe nahi bola karti hai kya???

wtever u gotta say... wtever u gotta do... we're rite here waiting... n watching out 4 u...

so always remember tat u will nvr walk alone... [:D]

The 'Mad' Orchid said...

@ Mann..
pehle 2 ek biggyyyyy hug n yesh u abslty rite...sunna padta hai aur tmlog ne bahut suna b hai ..:D n yeps i know u guys r alwyz thr wd me now n forever...luv u dearie..hugs n muahssssss..

Occasional Brilliance said...

hugs muahs...n loads f love

Sam said...

oye!! zara late ho gaya!! wot happened, why talking like a dukhi aatma???
chal pehle haans uske baad bata gal ki hai.... sab changa kar denge!!

The 'Mad' Orchid said...

oye sam...yeh sab thik hogya..as u said itz an vryyyyy ollllllll post so dunt worry buds m juz abstly fyn n changi n whn ive frnds like u arnd me 2 alwyz mke me changi ive no reasons 2 frown or 2 b broken apart.... :D dekh m grinnin shown al my 32 teeths..teehee..:p
thxs buds...tkcr

cm chap said...

Cheerup Girl... Whole world is waiting for you to explore... (No defntly this is not sympathy)

The 'Mad' Orchid said...

Cm chap....
wel thxs a lot 4 ur concern bt Im now vry much better rite now..abstly fyn :)btw...do i know u :P it ws nice dt al wnt me 2 explore d world n face wid al cheers...:D

Unknown said...

Hate this world!!! I guess this is not our sweet maddie that speaks, i mean i sincerely hopethat this is not the same maddie i saw @least twice and spoke to quite a bit...
Reading this post of urz, i wanna quote frost over wat u have to say~~i guess this will make ur mood swing a bit, don't know whether i'll be successful or not but still lemme try to~~
"It's when i'm weary of considerations,
And life too much like a pathless wood
Where your face burns and tickels with the cobwebs
Broken across it, abd one eye weeping
From a twig's having lashed across it open.
i'd like to get away from earth awhile
And then come back to it and begin over.
may no fate wilfully misunderstand me
And half grant what I wish and snatch me away
Not to return. Earth's the right place for love;
I don't know where it's likely to go better..."
All I can say is maddie you got me to lean onto, to scream your heart out, you got @least 2 good friends to speak your heart out...and me always to turn to whenever you need it and even when you don't...
MADHAVI stop apologising for something that never will ever hurt us...aur phir dost log hote kis liye hai...to vent out frustrations, to share your joys and weep with you when you are sad...but to stay by your side when you are angry on them the most...
maadhhhhhooooooobbbbbbbiiii...
I'm always there by ur side...
take loads of care...

Shruti said...

Hey, why so much depression...
Just give urself a relaxing time and you will see you will all yours..

TAke care

The 'Mad' Orchid said...

@ Sapuda..
pehle to juz wnt 2 say yesh i wil reamins urz truly aapki wohi maddie alwyz n alwyz...told u na :D n about d commnt i askd u 2 post a commnt uve written a history answer :p bt mez luved it d way u put in write poetry...n believe me now als fyn n bck to sqaure 1 n i know vry wel u al r thr wid me netym n evrytym:D no
matter cms n goes...
@ Shruti...
wel thxs 4 ur comment yeps i know juz a phase of growng up no basic depression as such..thxs 4 ur concern n if u dunno mind u cn read my other posts n comment on them 2..
Thxs...

Unknown said...

I hated history all my life...sort of ishqi ka asar!!!uskaa pol sci sun sun ke i also tend to answer long!!!
aur poetry ke baare mein...usually quote from a handful few of them...
yep maddie am always dere 4 u...take good care mads!!!

Cuckoo said...

Hmmm.. I was about to ask as what has happened but not now. :)

Glad to see you bubbly & dancing.

Keep it up.

bEAST said...

i had read your blog the very first time you visited mine, but sumhow nevr really got arnd to commenting. the thot process and all is very impressive, and so is the use of english, but the spellings are all messd up. you cant really use abbreviation and slangs, as potential readers might be unfamiliar with it and it makes it all the more difficult to dig into the post and understand it!

The 'Mad' Orchid said...

@ Cuckoo,
Thxs yaar 4 droppin by...yeps m bck my normal self...:)

@ Beast..
Hmmm....didn't actually get wht u meant...the thot process as in???

The 'Mad' Orchid said...

Oh btw Beast..
welcome finally to my blogpge oh i mean comment page :P

cm chap said...

Hope now ur fully cheerful and enjoying life...